Excuses or Executive Dysfunction?
A Neurodivergent Guide to ADHD Brains – What’s Real and What’s Gotta Go
We’ve all heard it:
“No more excuses.”
“Winners don’t whine.”
“If it matters to you, you’ll find a way.”
And sure—there’s some truth to that. Progress does require action. Growth does demand ownership.
But what happens when the obstacles standing in your way aren’t imaginary?
What if those “excuses” aren’t just mental fluff… but symptoms of how your brain actually works?
For people with ADHD and other forms of neurodivergence, the self-help world often feels like a rigged game. We’re handed advice built for neurotypical brains—advice that assumes we have consistent motivation, time awareness, and working memory. (Spoiler: we don’t.)
So instead of yelling “No more excuses,” maybe the better question is:
Is this an excuse… or a symptom?
Is this a real barrier I need support with—or a mental script I need to rewrite?
Let’s break it down.
1. The “Excuses” Self-Help Gurus Say to Eliminate—But Are Often Totally Legit for ADHD Brains
These are the ones that hustle culture dismisses—but if you’re neurodivergent, they’re often rooted in actual executive dysfunction. And no amount of “just try harder” is going to fix a dopamine imbalance or a working memory short circuit.
“I don’t have time.”
To the self-help world, this sounds like a lack of priorities. But ADHD time blindness means we often can’t accurately gauge how long things take—or how long they’ll take us, specifically.
Check out this breakdown of time blindness from ADDitude Magazine for a deeper dive.
“I just can’t focus.”
This one gets dismissed fast—“everyone loses focus!”
But ADHD focus isn’t about losing it occasionally—it’s about constantly battling for it. We’re not unmotivated. Our brains need more novelty, structure, or urgency to engage. That’s not an excuse—it’s neurology.
“I forgot.”
Neurotypical translation: “You didn’t care enough.”
Reality: ADHD working memory is a leaky bucket. If we don’t externalize it (write it down, set a reminder, say it out loud), it’s probably gone.
“I just didn’t feel like it.”
For most people, this sounds like laziness. But for ADHDers, it’s motivation dysregulation. Dopamine drought. No internal gas in the tank. Without stimulation or urgency, we literally can’t engage—not unless we’ve built a workaround or hacked our way in.
“I’ll do it later.”
Time blindness + low urgency = the ultimate delay cocktail. We’re not intentionally avoiding. We just can’t feel the urgency until the fire’s already burning.
“I work better under pressure.”
Not a myth—but it’s not sustainable, either. Many ADHDers ride the adrenaline wave to get things done… but at what cost? Chronic stress, burnout, and shame are waiting on the other side.
“I’m not ready yet.”
This one often masks perfectionism or fear of starting without a clear path. But for ADHDers, the “I’m not ready” feeling can come from being genuinely overwhelmed by unclear first steps or potential outcomes.
2. Excuses That Feel Real… But Might Be Holding You Back
These are tricky. They feel true—maybe even comforting. But they’re often mental scripts we’ve repeated for so long, we’ve mistaken them for facts.
“That’s just how I am.”
Maybe. But it’s also a way of shielding yourself from the vulnerability of change. ADHD brains are flexible and adaptive—but only if we believe they can be.
“I’ll never be consistent.”
Consistency as defined by neurotypicals? Maybe not.
But ADHD-consistency—falling down, getting back up, and showing up again and again in your own messy way? That counts. That’s progress. That’s real.
“If I can’t do it perfectly, I shouldn’t do it.”
Hello, all-or-nothing thinking. This is the trap that keeps us stuck: If it can’t be epic, it’s not worth starting. But guess what? Mediocre progress still moves you forward.
“It’s not the right time.”
If you’re waiting for the stars to align, prepare to wait forever. Neurodivergent life is rarely predictable. The “right” time is usually right after you start.
“I have to fix everything else first.”
The classic pregame spiral. You want to declutter, but first you need better storage bins… but first you need to clean your car… but first you need more energy…
Just pick a small win and start from the mess.
3. Excuses ADHDers Should Actually Eliminate
These are the stories that aren’t rooted in executive dysfunction. They’re just habits. Coping mechanisms. Mental placeholders we’ve outgrown.
“I’ll get motivated eventually.”
Maybe. But ADHD brains don’t run on “eventually.” They run on momentum. Start moving—even if it’s tiny. Motivation follows motion.
“I’ll remember later.”
You won’t. Seriously. Write it down, text it to yourself, tell a friend. Future You has zero idea what Present You is thinking.
“If I just push harder, I’ll break through.”
This one’s sneaky because it sounds empowering. But sometimes what you need isn’t more force—it’s rest. Or a better system. Or a different starting point.
“It’s too late.”
There’s no late. There’s just now. ADHDers have weird timelines—but we’re capable of incredible pivots at any age, on any path.
(Need a little hope? Check out Jessica McCabe’s story from How to ADHD. You’re not alone.)
“Nothing works for me.”
It might be true that what you’ve tried hasn’t worked. But that doesn’t mean nothing will. You need methods designed for your brain—not someone else’s.
Conclusion: You’re Not Lazy. You’re Not Broken. You’re Not Doomed.
You’re wired differently. That’s all.
Some of the obstacles in your path are real. They deserve compassion, support, and strategies that honor how you function.
Other times, the biggest thing standing in your way… is an outdated story you’ve been telling yourself.
And here’s the good news: you get to write a new one.
One where your challenges are real—but not fatal.
One where your brain needs a different toolkit—not more shame.
One where excuses become insights—and insights lead to action.
So go ahead: forgive the old excuses.
Then decide which ones you’re done carrying forward.
Because your story isn’t over. It’s just getting honest.
Want More ADHD-Friendly Tools (Without the Noise)?
I send one email a month called The Dopamine Drop.
It’s short, real, and made for ADHD brains who want practical insights, not another self-help hamster wheel.
You’ll get:
3 Nudges from me
2 Useful Finds
1 Question to spark progress
No spam. No fluff. Just real ADHD support, once a month.
Subscribe now and get a free “Dopamine Hacks Cheatsheet.”
Because you’re not lazy. You’re just misfiring.